Teach me how to Moooo !

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Mhoooooooooo !

http://www.mastersage.com/kwsnubb/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic&f=3&t=000231

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You're doing fine I read sir fart, don't understand what's all the fuz about

[je_oen]

Quite fine, but euh let me say......cows remain standing while sleeping......ever heard of "cow tipping"?
Mooh

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Sir Fart, now that you understand the essence of life...maybe it it time to join the DPC? It would only take a few mouseclicks

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Believe me .. we've got much more tantalizing imagery of this sort

[TeeDee]

Sir_Fart, indeed, isn't time to join DPC?

[Mobster]

Your wish is my command:

First make sure you're comfortable.
Then take a few deep breaths and try to determine within what time period you want to express yourself.
Once you have done this, proceed with loosening your belt, just for safety reasons.
Next step is unzipping your pants and take another deep breath.
Now it is time for the final step.
Timing is of the essence.
If you feel the time has arrived, pull down your knickers and press your white cheeks against your car window and voila!

Oh wait. It sais Moooo not moon

[Wirf]

Op vrijdag 07 december 2001 08:49 schreef je_oen het volgende:
[..] cows remain standing while sleeping [..]

I'm sorry to dissapoint you here, but cows don't remain standing while sleeping, they do lay down. Horses however do remain standing while sleeping

[je_oen]

Op vrijdag 07 december 2001 12:38 schreef Wirf het volgende:

[..]

I'm sorry to dissapoint you here, but cows don't remain standing while sleeping, they do lay down. Horses however do remain standing while sleeping

well, are they still awake when I run for my football through the "weide"? I see them always standing. I've Never seen horses with cow texture

[0rbit]

Op vrijdag 07 december 2001 12:38 schreef Wirf het volgende:

[..]

I'm sorry to dissapoint you here, but cows don't remain standing while sleeping, they do lay down. Horses however do remain standing while sleeping

I believe they both stand up while sleeping, just like giraffes and zebras

[Blistimo]

I do know that cows lay doen to redigest their food...

We don't like to stand up and barf, all the splashing makes our hooves dirty and all, so we lay down, capishe?

[je_oen]

Op vrijdag 07 december 2001 16:10 schreef Blistimo het volgende:
I do know that cows lay doen to redigest their food...

We don't like to stand up and barf, all the splashing makes our hooves dirty and all, so we lay down, capishe?

True

also true

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Take me to your leader, I want to become a Kow !

But we need to work out some details first, such as: I want to have access to the good grazing in the pasture. Where the grass is greenest and the feces are less than a foot deep ?

I wish to reserve the name Moo in your General Direction

I want to be sure there are no retributions for my Thwacking in the past. Im quite certain Ive damaged the brains of a few cows with my exuberant thwacking. As such, for my place in the pasture I dont want to be within a 1,000 meters of Ercewee, Punjab or Cow_Nipping.

Also, if I were to obtain the Secret Scrolls of NI ! for use by the Kows ( these scrolls contain all the secrets of the Knights) would that secure me a better place in the pasture ?

When do I get my eartag ? What color will it be ?

Sir Fart The Knight of Ni Who Moos

Moooni ! Mooooni ! Moo ! Mhhhhoooooooooo !

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Hey we cows don't sleep! We graze all night and day! And if you don't you'd better!!!

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Sir Farth got confused between increase and decrease....
Wow, we like those gals....

[Ercewee]

Sir Fart,

Mooohing is very simple, it only requires a lot of exercise. I have made a small training schedule for you.

At first we start small:
Week1:
Every day after waking up, after lunch and before bedtime: no, no, no, no (this is just for practice and looks quite like the ni's, like you used to do). (The no's before bedtime are especially good for you sex-life)
Week2:
Replace n with m and do the same schedule: mo, mo, mo, mo
Week3:
Try to lengten the sound: mooooo, mooooo, mooooo.
Week4:
Increase volume and try to let to sound come out of your toes:
MOOOOOOH, MOOOOOH, MOOOOOH.
Week5:
Try variation and try to sound sincere:
MoooHOOOOO, MOOOOOOH, moooh.

Now you are ready.

To further qualify for the Dutch Power Cows, you might try the Dutch version: BOE, BOE, BOE.

To monitor your progress, youll have to post on our board at least 4 times a week. This is an essential part of the training schedule, because then we are able to grade you and give advise about better mooohing.

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Ercewee,

I shall commence my language lessons at once. I must master Kow first, then Dutch.

No... no....NI !

Doh !

No...no...nino...El nino !!

Doh !

Are you sure it wouldn't be easier to teach the Kows to say Ni !?

I guess not

MooooHOOOOONI !

[Cow_tipping]

Op vrijdag 07 december 2001 08:49 schreef je_oen het volgende:
Quite fine, but euh let me say......cows remain standing while sleeping......ever heard of "cow tipping"?
Mooh

Yup,that's me!

Oh, and Sir_Fart, you forgot to change your team number. Reinstall the genome client using DPC's teamnumber (=1651007169)

If you need some assistance in getting rid of your one superfluous braincell? I can thwack you till it doesn't work no more.

Always the helping hand.

[Ercewee]

Op zaterdag 08 december 2001 02:47 schreef Sir_Fart het volgende:

Are you sure it wouldn't be easier to teach the Kows to say Ni !?

I guess not

MooooHOOOOONI !

Its seems to me that you need lot's of practice. Maybe knights are difficult to teach. Even a Dutch power cow can moooh the first day after he's born, but for a knight it takes about 5 weeks

Unfortunately (well actually luckily) cows are unable to say N*. This has something to do with their vocal cords. You can't teach them, you have to operate them first.
If the training has no effect after 5 weeks we start with a Pavlov-reaction training: Every time you say something resembling a moooh you'll get some grass (either you smoke it, or eat it, we don't care!). And every time you say something resembling a N*, we TWHACK!

If you are proficient in mooohing we'll get you on a Dutch language course: Introduction to a cows language!

[Servowire]

"Your mother was a hamster, and our father smelled of elder-berry's. Now go away, or i shall taunt you a second time!"

ni ni ni ni !


(Monthy Python roeleert )

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Ercewee,

I had missed your comment regarding visiting here 4 times a week. I will do my best to comply so as to speed my transition to becoming a Kow , but the Knights keep me on a short leash. I tend a cause a little havoc wherever I go, so they keep me from wandering too much.

I just remembered that there is a Moooohni practice thread over on KWSN so I can practice my El Nino's over there.

You may have noticed that the Knights are shrubbing furiously to find a cure for my mad Kow disease, so my journey to becoming a Kow may get interrupted.

The only problem is that the Knights are all loonies and tend to get easily distracted.

Mhhhhoooooonoooooo

[Ercewee]

Ah yes, the old moooh practicing thread. Come on Cows, let's help sir Fart and give some good examples.

Come on: moooh around a bit

[SandsOfArrakis]

Ni,ni,ni. Bring out the cows please and load them on the trebuchet!! (As seen in Monty Python and the search for the holy grail).

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Le Trebuchet ?! Also known as the Kow catapult ?! Oh noooo ! A Knights worst nightmare, Kows raining from the sky !!!

Run Away !! Run Away !

NooNi !

[Jis]

Op zondag 09 december 2001 01:56 schreef Sir_Fart het volgende:
Le Trebuchet ?! Also known as the Kow catapult ?! Oh noooo ! A Knights worst nightmare, Kows raining from the sky !!!

Run Away !! Run Away !

NooNi !

Yes knights, beware for the mighty cowtapult!

As everyone can witness, at least one of your fellow knights has already met its faith by our Basch using the cowtapult:

[Bas_f]

Op zondag 09 december 2001 03:12 schreef Jis het volgende:
Yes knights, beware for the mighty cowtapult!

As everyone can witness, at least one of your fellow knights has already met its faith by our Basch using the cowtapult:

Hehe..

I've even seen 'em explode spontaneously.


(Especially good for usericons... )